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"You'll see...things will be better
in Florida."
Packing us all into the old Ford
and hitting the road was the plan of the day. Running was always
the way of dealing with things and this was a run for the gold.
"I'm gonna miss him. He took
care of us and now we're on our own. But don't worry, I'll find another
man who will love us."
She couldn't understand the concept
of being worth something. Men and women, in her mind anyway, each
had their roles to play. The men took care of the women, and in return
the women did whatever they had to do. She would start a business
in Florida which would feed us all until she found the new Mr. Right.
It all meant nothing but a temporary belief in herself. She could
start a business but if she had to do it on her own, it would have to be
temporary. How could it be otherwise?
"Can we stop? I have to go
to the bathroom."
"Soon, dear, soon."
The long road flies by us as rain
hits the hood of the old Ford. What could we do but go along with
this plan? One day we'll grow up and do our own running. One
day we'll grow up and regress just like she has.
"Why do people die Mom?"
"They just do honey, they just do."
We finally stop and for a moment,
I think of running away. They won't miss me - I'm not worth anything
to them anyway. It's a circular thing. I go to the bathroom
and return to the car knowing that I have nowhere else to go. An
eleven year old goes where he's taken.
"You'll see, kids, it'll all work
out in Florida."
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